Saturday, March 11, 2006
hmm is there anybody in this world who is happy every single day of his/her life? or is there someone thats sad and miserable everyday? i don't think so. i guess everybody has their ups and downs. somedays there's just nothing for u to be happy abt, but nothing really sad for u to be depressed abt. i call that a normal day.

so today has been a normal day for me. but somehow i think deeper into it and mbbe its not. i'm feeling worried. and sad. and sian. and guilty. and most of these things do not concern me.

suddenly there seems to be so many things for me to worry about. no not studies. not yet anyway. i worry for my friends. many of them seem to be going through a tough time. and i can't do anything to help them. i mean it doesn't involve me at all. i just look and feel worried for them. ahhh i shldn't bother abt things that do not concern me rite? beats me why i'm so affected by it too. i've nvr been so affected by such things before. mbbe i shldn't care abt it? it doesn't even involve me. haiz..

and den i'm feeling sad coz i'm feeling sad for my friend. i guess she won't want me to feel this way. but i can't help feeling that way. her words, her experession keeps appearing in my head and i really feel.. there's just so much effort put into it yet.. the scars left behind would not fade away so easily. hang in there ok!

and sian. i dunno. there was band prac today. i guess it was ok. and err we had lunch but i seroiusly didn't feel like eating. wasn't hungry at all. den went to play xbox for 4hrs. den arcade. den dinner. i really wanted to buy my mom's present but there wasn't an opportunity. and thus i felt like some guilty shit coz its my mom's birthday and i didn't even have dinner with her. but i really wasn't hungry and i really didn't have the mood to.

yupp mbbe its coz i'm really really tired and drained frm all the lack of sleep. hmm good night!
© 2004/2007 qian. all rights reserved.